the chari blog

2010 : The Ten Peso Version

2010-12-27T01:14:00.004-05:00

2010 came and went like the wind. I remember sitting at my desk last year at this time and finishing the book. It feels as if it was just yesterday.

2010 brought me and my family tears, and heartache and some of my greatest achievements. And as it comes to an end I feel as I am stepping into a new chapter of my life and am ready to take 2011 by storm.

2010 Highlights:

- My Father-in-Law was diagnosed with Cancer this past year and was healed this year as well. I am so blessed to still have him with us as we head into 2011.

- FAST21: I was given the vision for fast21 this year...this in itself could be a blog post :)

- My First Nationally Released Record Released on ITUNES this past year along with the book that tells the stories of the album. You can check them out at http://charise.org.

- This year I was honored to serve on the worship team along side my best friends and celebration church. I've always served at my home church but 2010 brought it to a whole-notha-level!

- My business has really flourished this year as well. Its really scary when you put yourself out there, but God is so faithful. I KNOW that I am exactly where I am supposed to be, and that feeling is priceless.

- I have gained a WHOLE NEW PERSPECTIVE: 2010 changed the way I look at things, showed me what was really important and how to trully trust and see God even if my reality looks bleak.

I am looking forward to the transitions 2011 is gonna bring. This coming year I turn 30 and I feel like for the first time in a long time I am making a difference with my life. This life is so short and I want to live it with an eternal mindset. My goals this coming year are to be more intentional in pouring into the next generation. My heart's desire is to allow God to use my life in such a way that when that day comes and I am standing in his presence he'll just high five me! lol

So bring it on 2011... I am ready for you...

- chari

The Holidays

2010-12-21T22:57:00.000-05:00

My life is INSANELY BUSY....I miss writing my blog, so bare with me...I'll definitely have some fun stuff after Christmas to share...

till then check out some cool pictures from my Thanksgiving holiday...

Gale Force Winds!

2010-11-03T22:44:00.003-04:00

So I know I talk ALOT about people that influence me. I know this. But It's important to surround yourself with people you can be honest with and people who will make you better! Doing life alone without people to walk along side you to laugh and cry with you is just not life at all.

Last month I was asked to come along side one of the people I look up to the most ( Linda Riddle ) and assist her in a pretty major project at my home church. I am so humbled by the work, and that I get to do what I love all while hanging out with my friend! Every Wednesday I pretty much am living my dream. Today I spent 7 hours in an office making graphics, laughing and crying with my friend. I mean, seriously, I have the best job in the world.

Things I Learned/Experienced today:

1. My middle name sounds awesome sung like a Mexican lullaby
2. the words " DO IT " sound great with a new jersey accent
3. Dr. Pepper and Chipotle is of the Lord
4. The word "squeeze" will forever traumatize me
5. Leaders serve loudly.

moral of the day: "serving, no matter in what capacity heals the soul."

I like to Drive Fast.

2010-10-25T15:29:00.007-04:00

I was asked to help lead worship out at our camden county campus this past Sunday. It's a bit of drive but I enjoy driving. For some reason it seems to calm my soul and I am able to clear my thoughts enough to hear from God.

Lately my work, stress, and life has clogged my heart and my ears and I've felt like God and I needed a moment. I put on my Ipod, and just drove.

I thought about the songs I'd be leading, and prayed I'd remember the words and guitar parts. I worried about the meeting with a friend and hoped I'd not allow myself to be too emotional. I was bombarded by my work and the realization I am behind in and all the things I want to accomplish but feel I might never reach them. Needless to say my calming drive to Camden became an anxiety trip on all the things I can't control. Just then I noticed a truck on the side of the road with a flat tire, and I felt God say, "Chari, things could be so much worse!"

I seem to always come back to this.

I am driving 80 miles an hour past my life and I am missing the life moments, the life lessons I need to learn. These are the lessons I need to survive the next season. I'm rushing through the levels without getting all the points!

I read this morning in 1 John 3 "If you are wise and understand God's ways, prove it by living an honorable life, doing good works with humility that comes from wisdom."

I sat at my desk and closed my eyes, "Dear Jesus, am I living an honorable life?"... "Does my life reflect a life of humility that only comes from wisdom?" The verse went on to say that , "Wisdom from above is first of all PURE, it is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere. And those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of righteousness."

I started thinking of the people God had but in my life that embodied these things...

First was my husband who before anything is the wisest person I know and always has the purest intentions. It never matters how or if he was wounded in the situation he always takes the high road and seeks God about everything. I can't believe I was blessed with him as my husband...its mind boggling.

Then I began to think of Lindsey V (the lindseystar) who is the most sincere person I have ever met. I've watched her yield any personal ambition, and even the call on her life so she could build others up., and see others flourish. It's awe inspiring to sit down and hear her speak of the vision she has for the ministry in which I serve. I hope to one day be half the woman she is.

Then there is Carter, who makes my heart hurt. This kid will seek after God with such reckless abandonment that one might think she's fallen of the face of the earth...She is my reminder that this life isn't about me but about those that are coming up after me.

...each makes me long to be better and...the funny thing is these are the 3 people I argue with the most. And yet they love me, and encourage me, and remind me that in order to live this life the way I feel called to, that I need to yield, and stop driving so fast through this life.

So here I am thanking God for every moment, every simple drive, every person in my life that makes me better.

- Chari

What if you never reap what I've sown, Will I still sow?

2010-10-14T23:00:00.003-04:00

I find myself asking myself this question recently. I've been plagued with "WHAT IF" for as long as I can remember, and pressing through the uncertainty has been difficult but something i've grown accustomed to doing.

I could actually make a list of my "what if's"...they include serving, and my career, and whether I am making the right decisions, because the outcomes have not been what I expected. I'd think I have it all together at this point but alas I don't. I watch people I love suffer through disappointment and loss and I wonder, is it worth it?

----

When I was 19 I watched a woman break a bat over her knee. Her name was Janet Abraham-Clark. She was part of the Power Team. Even at 19 I was ready to give up, I was then, like now, consumed with the "what if"...She took the remnant of this wooden Louisville slugger and wrote out Galatians 6:9.

So let's not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don't give up.

---
Not sure why at 11 p.m. on a random Thursday evening I feel compelled to share that I yet again do not have it all together, and question God constantly. Not sure why, especially since my list of things God has walked me through outweighs my "WHAT IF" list, but then again I am imperfect and broken. I am human and God is bigger than all my distrust and questions.

So to answer the question...What if you never reap what i've sown, Will I still sow?

Undoubtedly, Yes

"All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make the better." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

I hope one day I can stand before the throne and see Jesus face to face and have him say, "good job Chari, you did exactly what I asked of you..."

-Dreaming Big. Loving God.
Chari

The 10 peso Version: My life in a matter of months....

2010-09-21T13:25:00.019-04:00

In May I sat through and served at the Shine Conference, and felt God lay the burden of FAST21 on my heart. Those that know me and have been with me a while, know that music has always been my goal. And at this point I really believed the album would forever be stalled and that the direction I was headed would not include that aspect of what I felt God had called me to in my youth. I was wrong, in June of this year the album released as well as the book that accompanied it. In July I felt compelled with the help of my dear friend, Jenna Brut, to launch Fast21 with a Benefit Concert. Our goal was to raise money for the A21 campaign and showcase various artists, and the FAST21 Tees. And on Sept 10, 2010 we were successful in just that.

At the end of that night I was beyond humbled, and moved to tears. But as the night settled I began to think, "What next, Lord?" I am so excited about all that God is doing with Fast21, and all God is doing to use my existence. My hope is that at the end of my days, that people can say I used all I was for the kingdom. But more than all that, I hope to remain transparent.

" For I resolve to nothing, but Christ and him crucified..." ~The Apostle Paul

Thank you to all those that have supported me and keep me lifted up.
Get ready, the best is yet to come.

- Chari

My crazy life.

2010-08-26T21:17:00.000-04:00

WorshipJunkie Media ( my day job ) and The Fast21 Initiative have currently moved into our own office and my life has just gotten so much busier if that's even possible. Between work, The upcoming event, serving at my home church, and my everyday life as a wife, I have found I am taking WAY more naps.

It's amazing all that God is doing. For example...

1. This weekend (29th) Celebration Church will be singing a new song at Midtown and Orange Park that I co-wrote with Dougie Fowler, and Lindsey Vartanian. It's called "for the glory of you". I am beyond words, beyond humbled.

2. The Fast21 Event is going to be life changing. Please make sure you get your tickets either online, through me, or coming by the office (4519 Beach Blvd, Jax, Fl. 32207. We are in build 4200 in rm. 104)

3. Our Fast21 tees will be here next week and im awestruck at finally seeing this come to pass. Excited isn't a good enough word to explain how I feel about it!

and that's just a few things....SO PLEASE make sure to spread the word and get your tickets. Hope to see you guys soon.

Chari.

Fast21 Launch : Get Ready

2010-07-29T13:57:00.004-04:00

I wake up every morning and say OMG I can't believe this is happening, Please God don't let me screw this up. I feel like maybe I should stop every couple steps, bow down and perhaps light something on fire as a sacrifice. I've never been more humbled or in awe then I am right now...

I've decided to not have a CD Release party but instead we've decided to do a benefit Concert and Launch FAST21 Apparel instead. My reasoning is, I don't want an evening where it's all about me.

So here is the skinny:

WHEN: Friday, September 10th, 2010
WHERE: Deep Blue @ the Jacksonville Landing, in Downtown Jacksonville
TIME: 7 p.m.
COST: $15 Every single cent that is brought in from ticket sales will go directly to the A21 Campaign!

WHAT IS THE NIGHT GONNA LOOK LIKE?
Well its gonna be awesome.... We will have a DJ!!! Its a secret I won't say who is gonna do it, but its gonna be awesome! There will also be a concert, featuring that amazing Corey Kilgannon, Lindsey Carter, and of course me with some more of my talented friends! We will also have representatives from some local foundations that are doing incredible things to combat human sex trafficking. Get ready for a night of music, art, and Jesus...

Each artist will have merch ( music and such ) for you guys to buy as well as the FAST21 Tshirt that will Launch that night!

love you guys,
Chari

Dream Big. Love God.

2010-06-14T02:19:00.002-04:00

ONE:

When I was 17 I felt the call upon my life lead me towards music. I knew music ministry would be part of my life forever and in the last 10 years I've successfully released 2 full length indie records, 1 EP, and a live album....and well, POTENTIALLY This week my first nationally released album hits Itunes.

TWO:

When I was 21, I felt compelled to write a book. I wrote 7 chapters before my PC crashed and the book was erased. This year God gave me my dream back and the book is completed, and I currently have them printed and boxed in my office ready to share with the world.

THREE:

I always new I'd be part of a church that was world changing. I knew I was called to the Lord through Worship, and being part of a worship experience that was changing lives was something I hoped i'd one day be a part of....and today I can say I am. Celebration church spans the globe, feeds orphans, restores girls that have been rescued from sex trafficking, and on a weekly basis I watch people give there life to Christ in massive numbers.

....God has been so faithful, and now that I am humbly walking in the dreams I asked God for in my youth, my heart and my mind cannot fathom what He has in store for me in the next season...I feel a bit like David did as he brought the arc of the covenant towards the city. I feel as if every couple steps I should stop, and bow to my knees and thank God for this moment, for this season. And for the Grace to live this out...

One of the first worship leaders I really loved, when I first started playing music was, Rita Springer. And this moment her song Created to worship fills my heart.

I am your sacrifice
I am your offering
I was created to worship you
There's nothing I could bring
That would mean more then this one thing
I was created to worship you.

You are all I have
All I have is you
You are all I am
All I am is you

Whatever you ask of me
There's no one I'd rather be
Then one created to worship you
In all that comes my way
Poverty fame or pain
I was created to worship you

Without you there's nothing Lord
Now and forevermore
I was created to worship you

In Awe,
Chari

JUNE VLOG!!!

2010-06-08T21:47:00.003-04:00

Um why am I an absolute weirdo!!!??? ENJOY the epic fails and crazy JUNE ramblings.

My Current View...

2010-05-30T23:01:00.001-04:00

I've learned to love the rain since it has been my residence for the last couple years. The storms of life have been so constant that I've learned to actually see the beauty in the clouds, and dance in the rain.

But I will say nothing has ever been more beautiful then my current view. The rain has slowly stopped and I am able to see the light of the sun peak over the mountain range I have been fighting for so long. And even if the rain starts up again, I've seen hope rise out my despair. Pastor Stovall has been preaching about Suffering Well. I can't say that in the last couple years, and in my sadness that I suffered well. Sadly it wasn't until the end that I truly felt peace, and began to understand that all I'd walked through was nothing compared to what God was trying to ready me for. My hope and my prayer is that what is facing me now, this call, this mandate I feel pressing on my heart strings will be something I walk through with joy and peace. And that Christ is in the rain, and fire along with me. What a beautiful revelation of Christ's Faithfulness, that even in the fire and even in my darkest days that his whisper was and is my hope and his love was and is my light.

I am excited about all God is doing in this next season, I just hope I'm ready and willing to recognize him, and be flexible no matter the task, no matter the journey.

Dreaming Big, and Loving God.
Chari

The Book has arrived!!!!

2010-05-24T23:19:00.000-04:00

Okay so im sure most people are like what? I thought you were releasing an Album?

Well I am...

but I wrote a book to accompany the album. Its called "Who I am" and it is the stories, and lyrics behind the album as well as 15 day Devotional. The book is something I've always felt compelled to do and never did. The albums were always easy to complete but the book has been something I ran from for quite a while...but not any more. They've arrived and are ready to given out with the albums....

May 2010 Vlog

2010-05-23T16:36:00.001-04:00

What a month this has been...

2010-05-22T22:27:00.005-04:00

Its not even finished yet, but May 2010 has been life changing. I will break it down in 3 major things that have happened or that I have experienced thus far...

1. The Shine Conference
here are some amazing things I learned at Shine.

-God is not into who's better. God is into who's obedient (Lisa Young)

- Live for Glory or Die Trying (Kerri Weems)

- My Life is a vapor in eternity, and I need to live it with an eternity perspective. ( Christine Caine)

This comment was made after the story that birthed the Fast21 Initiative. I can't just live my life and worry about my own selfish agenda when there is so much to do.

- I am not a pond, a body of water made to bask in the presence of the son. I am a river made to flow out and touch the world. ( Mercy Lokulutu )

Honorable mention I met an amazing worship Leader named Sandra Ruiz, from Celebration Austin who totally spoke into my life! Love you friend...

2. Fast21
Shine really messed me up and after hearing Christine Cain speak about human trafficking my heart broke beyond repair. The story she told, made my soul ache and I new i could not live this life without doing something. Below is a video of the story I heard. and http://fast21.org is the result.

3. The Music
*** The album is almost done!!!! Its getting mastered as I write this and will be available for download we believe by the first 2 weeks in JUNE!!!!!

***Did I mention the book is Printed and Ready!!!!

*** LISTEN TO THE SINGLE HERE

Also there is another announcement concerning the music I can't share Yet....but its gonna be pretty major!!!

May brings flowers for sure.

Dream Big. Love God.
Chari

The Single

2010-05-16T01:50:00.000-04:00

What if i told you that the album is actually almost done...like for real this time. What? Don't believe me? Okay....well listen to the single called free featuring the amazing Lindsey Vartanian.

Part 2_Passion has no halfway mark : [The Wait]

2010-04-22T11:00:00.009-04:00

I am pretty sure its in Superman II where Superman struggles with the life given to him, and the result is he gives his powers back. He just wants to be normal, ( what he assumes normal is any way).

I certainly can say I have at times felt this way, and even as I write this I can honestly say more than not I feel like this...

I can't fly, and I can't see through walls but I have this call on my life that at times has felt like I am wrapped in chains. I was reminded of what Paul said, ( Romans 1:1) that he was a slave to Christ and I definitely have felt at times like a slave and not a thriving individual.

But being that I am a problem solver, to a fault at times, this latest realization has caused me to trace my steps back and evaluate what has led me to this feeling of wanting to give it back, and become what I perceive as normal. And all things lead back to one thing...

I struggle with the wait, and in the wait I have bypassed why God has me there.

the end result ... my heart has grown weary.

The Wait.

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. Prov. 13:12

Not sure what your waiting on, but i've been waiting for some major stuff. And it seems like no matter how long I wait, the only thing that awaits me is more waiting laced in trial after trial. Sadly in this waiting room, I at times have lost my vision, my hope, and my sense of self.

I've been in and out of hospitals and waiting rooms my whole life it seems , and everyone can agree waiting in a Dr.'s office and watching people get called in when you've been waiting longer is SUPER annoying. Especially when your hypothetically bleeding to death and they seem to only have a scratch! ...*sigh ...story of my life.

negative aspects of the wait

1. Waiting in general sucks.
2. Waiting rooms usually are smelly and muggy, and a depressing shade of 1983 baby blue (but in my spiritual waiting room its just uncomfortable, and makes me wanna cry, and permanently sit on my couch)
3. Waiting hurts, and stretches us in places we never realized we needed to be stretched.

positive aspects of the wait

1. Waiting molds your character. Sometimes our character cannot sustain the next season and in the wait is where God builds our Character.
2. Waiting Rooms give us the opportunity to reflect God in a setting that is less desirable. It takes a special person to love the unlovable, and to reflect Christ when they feel abandoned themselves. But its in these moments where God can really use us.
3. The Waiting room strips away "self" and can be easily mistaken of stripping us of vision.
Truth is we are being stripped of is our vision. Many times what we see is not what God see's and in order for us to move forward we need new eyes.

Though waiting is the worst, waiting is what is needed to move forward. And even though at times I (you) feel like we haven't taken a step, God is making strides on our behalf.

So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up. Galatians 6:9

So the lesson for today kids is that the wait refines your passion.

April 2010: Album Vlog

2010-04-19T16:05:00.005-04:00

Get Connected

2010-03-29T01:54:00.001-04:00

Free Downloads

2010-03-28T21:03:00.000-04:00

Hey Guys,
Unfortunetly there have been some unforseen set backs, and delays with the upcoming album. Because you guys have been so awesome and supportive during this process here are 2 free downloads from the last album. Enjoy.

Part 1: Passion has NO halfway mark

2010-03-26T23:11:00.002-04:00

I am a pretty passionate person. I love fully and there isn't a whole lot of middle ground. So when things go awry, or when the unknown replaces the certain ( which has happened more then I can even count ) I have had to learn how to find a middle ground. Even in moments where I struggle my heart aches because my faith and passion for Christ burns and It won't turn off, even though I try to turn it off.

The last week, even though my flesh wants to hideaway, I've made myself stay in the word . ( which is very difficult for me) I've been studying the life of Joseph. If anyone had some seriously sketchy stuff happen to him, Joseph really is the poster child. As I studied his life I realized he never really questioned God, he didn't blame God, and he never quit on God.

Part 1: Questioning God

I am sure at some point he was like, "SERIOUSLY, GOD!?". He was a human being. But when I say question, I mean a sassy questioning kinda like Job did. If you read the story of Job you'll find God spoke to Job pretty sternly about questioning Him. As I read about Job and mediated on Joseph I felt a bit frustrated...I have recently found myself in the midst of a massive detour, and I really just want to scream at the heavens, "AGAIN? REALLY!". But if I have learned anything through Joseph, and Job I know the outcome is always better then the temporal desire of us as humans.

I imagine Joseph in prison ( in my mind its a prison like the Chateau Dif, like in the Count of Monte Cristo ) and he was favored among all the others and God used him in that prison. God used Joseph's gifting IN A PRISON! And that moment was just one of the many things God used to eventually bring forth to save his people from famine...

So I hope no matter what prison you find yourself in that you know no matter the setting, God can and will totally use you for amazing things. Be patient, one day like Job things will be restored and like Joseph your life purpose is bigger then you can even imagine.

Staggering on through the impossible ( thanks Trish ),
Chari

My Life is screaming...

2010-03-17T15:42:00.001-04:00

....the question is, "what is my life screaming to the world"? In this moment my life is screaming...what it is screaming is a bit tangled and discombobulated. My hope is that those in hearing distance hear my heart and my desire for more of God, but I fear that is not the case on most days. I've spent the last five years chipping away at negative aspects of my life and attempting to run full speed towards the goal that is Christ. I won't lie, I've taken "smoke breaks" and have walked most of the way but the race has continued and my desire to chase something more has still been my driving force. But what do we do when that amazing shout our heart lifts as praise to our saviour turns into that annoying yell that Loyd Christmas screams, in Dumb and Dumber? You know which noise i'm talking about, the most annoying sound ever! What happens when our excitement for all that God is doing becomes stagnant and all the things we saw moving forward have shattered or have broken along the way...and you're just there...treading water...

The Answer: "Just keep Swimming!" ~Dori

You can't drowned if you just keep swimming. You can't sink if you just keep swimming. So You move forward you see the good in the bad, and the beauty in the darkness. You seek God, though you can't see wear the heck your next step is...

Those who know your name will trust in you. For you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.
Psalms 9:10

Found it!

2010-02-15T23:53:00.002-05:00

I am in constant search for my purpose. I long to know God's will in my life. I'm such a royal screw up, that's right I am, that if I stop searching It's very easy for me to become upset at the things I cannot fix or move forward and I just fade in the backdrop. Every day I can make a list of my failures, and how I've fallen short. I'm a walking disaster.

For example... Just today:
1. I slept 2 hours last night cause I wasn't feeling well so I spent the whole day angry and mean.
2. I definitely reached my sketchy word quota today! I think I went over..
3. there were maybe 10 different situations where i should have been Christ-like and instead totally acted like a big baby...
4. i've allowed certain situations to stress me out beyond belief to where its making me physically ill!
( my inner sanity is screaming at me, " SERIOUSLY! Get a hold of yourself." I am sure if my inner sanity was a person they would slap me like they slapped the lady in the movie airplane! hahaha" )

and that is just today, february 15, 2010.

Tonight as I was reading my Bible I came across something i've read maybe 50 times and it never clicked.

^"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

So im in search of what God wants in my life, right? Well, there it is...

1. BE JOYFUL ALWAYS: How about not allowing my flesh and stupid situations steal my joy! I have so many thing to be joyful about. I just celebrated 6 years married to most amazing man ever, I have an amazing job and career! I have an amazing family and Awesome friends and a life giving church! Dude Its a Win all around!
2. PRAY CONTINUALLY: So all God wants is to hear me and hang out with me? Well that's easy.
If only I spent less time being a psycho workaholic and on my facebook then maybe God would just blow my mind with a verse i've read 50 times before! JESUS WIN!
3. GIVE THANKS IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES: Okay so I don't do this very well. I'm a whiner! I'm an EPIC WHINER! So tomorrow i'm gonna try to work this one out....

Well there you have it folks...."God's will for you in Christ Jesus.."

Please Jesus, Help me do this right...

~Chari

Chasing The Unknown

2010-01-12T22:54:00.001-05:00

Another year has come and gone and where 2009 the goal was set and accomplished, in 2010 I am faced with the unknown. I am staring at the things I can't control and its been a bit nerve racking, I won't lie.

Last Year I set a goal to not miss what God had for me. I ran non-stop through the year and finished a book, started my business, and completed my first nationally released album that will be released soon. This year I have found the first three weeks to be very quiet. The craziness has subsided and I've been forced to stop running. Forced to stop and listen and reevaluate. My goal this year is to not hesitate and look back. I want to continue to allow God to use my life in whatever capacity that is. This year I am going to continue to chase the unknown and do it without questions.

-Chari

Remedy Drive (my thoughts)

2009-12-20T08:10:00.010-05:00

This is my New Favorite Band.

They are called "Remedy Drive". I stumbled upon them one night on the church channel. To my surprise I was pretty shocked how awesome they were and it renewed my love for Christian Music, which for the last decade has been a bit lack luster. I was blessed to see them the other night live and I was blown away. This is an artists artist! Their lyrics are awesome and the fluidity of the band was suberb, and makes your heart literally beat outside your chest! THEIR SHOW WAS BANANAS! Not sure if it was the lead singers acrobatics or the fact that these four brothers were one of the best bands I've seen in an extremely long time, I was totally moved. Very Humble guys (I was able to meet David the lead singer and piano player, who came out and talked to the fans in line, as they waited in the cold. I also met Paul the youngest brother and an amazing guitar player).

Buy this album its great.

- Check out their Video for their single , "Daylight"

Music to my ears...music to my soul...

2009-12-07T00:49:00.006-05:00

Christmas is coming and i'll tell you im not a big holidays person.

I'm not a alot of things person if that makes sense...

Excited about this year that is coming and grateful for this amazing productive year that has raced past me...This Christmas Esteban and I have decided to give each other music for Christmas. We bought a new "family Ipod" and revamped our Itunes. So i've been blessed with some new tunes.

I thought I'd share quickly some amazing new and old music i've been listening too. So if your looking for gift ideas or just something awesome these albums are stellar.

1. Switchfoot "Hello Hurricane"

2. John Mayer "Where the Light is: live in L.A."

3. Foo Fighters "Greatest hits"

4. Gloria Estefan "90 Millas"

5. Joy Williams " One of those Days EP"

Happy Listening...Chari

2 a.m. ramblings.....Sleep is over rated!

2009-11-27T05:15:00.000-05:00

DISCLAIMER: I AM ON A LOT OF MEDS!!!

Haven't slept much lately.

Tonight Im awake due to my bronchitis and this stupid cough that keeps making my asthma flair up. The stupidity of all this being sick nonsense is Im always working and never resting and I have horrible eating habits and never exercise! So once or twice a year I get bronchitis or pneumonia, cus i "supposedly" have an unhealthy lifestyle called "WORKING". BEING SICK IS STUPID!

This constant lack of running myself dry has now led to my lungs having scar tissue on it! So im supposed to take this preventive asthma medicine that I never take! Why not you might ask...well cause i forgot to and then just stopped!

SO..im awake sitting in the living room, can't breathe and my cat just farted on me... Esteban is asleep.

I've always been a person that could sleep through anything. I can sleep through storms, and people screaming, and the TV being on, and lately the rat who lives in my attic has been having keg parties and I just sleep right through em. But these last couple nights seems like my body sleeps but my mind won't. Maybe its the holidays, and the reality that this year is coming to and end? Maybe its its all the drastic changes in my life...Not sure....but every year around this time im usually pretty sick and wondering if where im at in this world is where im supposed to be.

Im 28...I've chased a lot of dreams and this coming year i might just catch it.
This coming year i might actually join the list of those who have tasted the unknown...

So this thanksgiving weekend im thinking the thing im most thankful for is "the dream".

I dreamed of love and God gave me Esteban.

I dreamed of my giftings being used in a away beyond my own imagination and last week I was able to be part of an amazing team that touches thousands.

Dreams are where its at.

I'd rather have lived this life with a dream and fail, then to have never dreamed at all.

I guess that's what makes this life livable....dreams

"But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness,

and all these things shall be added to you."

Matthew 6:33

-chari

What Inspired the Album...

2009-11-19T09:36:00.000-05:00

Many things inspired this upcoming album titled, WHO I AM. But the album is dedicated to the students i taught last year. Their lives inspired me, and being a part of their everyday made me a better person and gave me hope in the midst of my chaotic existence...

This inspires the album:

Album Update

2009-11-14T19:01:00.000-05:00

The Album is almost done....We record vocals tomorrow (11|15) and finish up Monday (11|16) with Lindsey Vartanian and Matt Adcox adding the final touches. We are looking for a early 2010 release...So late Jan. or early Feb.

More info soon will be up about the CD release and where you can get tickets for the show.

I won't lie its a bit overwhelming knowing this all coming to an end and the next chapter is on the verge of beginning.

The website charise.org has just been revamped, and the book is nearly done....

Im very much in awe of all this...

-Chari

This is me trying to put a pot roast in the microwave.

2009-06-23T14:50:00.001-04:00

I've always been a person the rushed through everything. I've lived 27 years like this: I wake up throw what ever is clean on, brush my teeth, stare at my hair and think its okay i'll wear a hat. When mowing the lawn i run everything over, i never clear out the lawn or even bother looking. I drive fast and if it fits in the microwave then i nook it! A dear friend sat me down recently and said you go so fast you don't enjoy your life....

I know Im a million miles an hour. I can design a site, listen to music, all while making dinner, washing clothes, talking on the cell phone, and as i'm running through my day I don't enjoy it. Im constantly waiting to live my life. I'm waiting for the next big thing. The next season....that one season i've been waiting for for 10 years.

And a bout a month ago I just stopped running things over. I just stopped. I woke up on my 28th birthday and I looked in the mirror and thought what have I been waiting on. I spent my birthday at The Shine Conference and just felt like all that i had been running over and rushing through were life lessons, character builders i missed. So i just stopped trying to do it all. And I gave it back to God. Here...i don't want it anymore unless your in it. So be it.....life please begin.

I stopped asking, and wondering and just sat still. I just sat still.
And everday God just started to show me, move me, I'd hear watch that, speak these words...

i've been an emotional head case ever since.

So i sit here 28 and exactly where im supposed to be. Hanging off a cliff, with nothing attached ready too jump. No agenda, dreams given back to the one who gave them to me and ready for whatever is next....

humbled.

I'm ready now.........

-chari

Life is too short to live halfway!

2009-03-12T11:43:00.000-04:00

“Let us be about setting high standards for life, love, creativity, and wisdom. If our expectations in these areas are low, we are not likely to experience wellness. Setting high standards makes every day and every decade worth looking forward to.”

-Greg Anderson

There are things in my life I have failed at....whether it was a friendship, job, or a goal I set for myself....if I failed it was because I gave up, fell asleep, lost interest, or it was removed from me....never because I lacked the ability or know how. If anything I have always been very goal oriented, and even though I've always been a bit disorganized...its a controlled chaos... :) ....but too many times in my life people have said that, "I shouldn't set my standards, goals, or ideology on other people". I was even told my standards were too high....

The Bible says to be "Imitators of God" and if i'm chasing that goal shouldn't my standards be reaching as well? I am supposed to try to be the best wife to my husband, and the best daughter, the best guitar player, I am supposed to try!! Its what God placed in our DNA to do things in excellence unto the Lord!!! UUUUGGGGHHHHH!!!!

I know I have failed...in so many areas...but what's wrong with chasing excellence and making sure the circle you influence desires excellence as well. I am the queen of acquaintances and my true inner circle is very few.....but even with that I pray that whoever you are that you see that life is to short to live halfway!! Too Short to Live halfway!!!

I won't apologize for chasing things i may never catch...i'd rather live this life knowing i tried, i fell, i conquered, i loved and lost! So in everything i do I try.....to be on time, ready to go, and ready to be who God has called me to be....in excellence, with fervor, and covered by Grace....by grace.

-chari

"Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children"
Ephesians 5:1

the Unexamined life is not worth living...

2009-02-28T21:38:00.000-05:00

Socrates said...."the Unexamined life is not worth living..." ..i find this quote to be so true and it has become something i try to live by...always searching my heart for the right motives and making sure more than anything i am positive influence to those in my circle...those who are moments and those who watch me from a far.

I've spent most of my days feeling misunderstood...and sadly most of those days I rarely examined my motives or the why behind the what...And now i spend my days in a constant wonder, "am i making the right choice, what is my motivation.......I just want my students to feel inspired..those who hear my music to feel there soul lifted, and mostly those who know me to know 2 things....1. i love God more than anything else..and 2. that my influence be a positive one..

the bottom photo is a collage of some my amazing students who are my inspiration, my heart, and my motivation to constantly search myself...

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.
Psalms 139:23

-Chari

The women in my life.....

2009-01-25T08:29:00.000-05:00

I'm 27. A wife of almost 5 years (feb 14th) and i can truthfully say the most influential woman in my life up to about a year ago was my amazing mother. I say she is amazing because when i was little i was very sick and she never gave up hope i would be healed. And when we were young and had no money and our car had no heater as we drove to school in the Michigan winter she would sing us songs so we would forget how hungry and cold we were....my mother is amazing....a dreamer to the core.

But about a year ago i found myself in a very unfamiliar place where i felt quite alone and uncertain about my future or whether the calling i knew God has placed upon my life was ever really going to happen. In this year i was literally stripped of everything i ever thought i was and i felt the most forsaken. It's to date the darkest moments of my life, i won't elaborate... i'm not in a place where i feel led to share about those moments....i'll just say i'm grateful to be looking back and seeing how God brought me out of it. Maybe one day ill share that....i'm just not there yet....

But today as i sit drinking my starbucks in the empty kitchen of my home church i find myself thinking of the women God has placed before me this past year. The women God placed in my life in this season so i wouldn't feel like i was alone or walking this life with no direction or examples. So i want to take this opportunity to tell you (whoever you might me) who these amazing lighthouses for me are. They are in no particular order.....

Melissa Johnson:
This is a person who never lets me get away with anything. I mean i try, i won't lie. But she just calls me out on EVERYTHING, and in the greatest way.....with love. She is my reminder that the dream is possible and the tears are totally worth it.

Linda Riddle:
Ever had someone in your life who just see's past your BS? Linda is my BS meter. She will just say something to me, speak into my life in such a way and it always seems to just pierce my heart and always end up making me feeling like OMG she knows!? I want to be like the Jesus in Linda. She is the coolest person i have ever met and in the lonliest moments of the last year, God used her to harass me via email....and every time i would read her emails i would just cry and be like man if she only knew how screwed up i was..and alone i felt...every time i see her i just want to hug her and be like, " you helped save me....and you don't even know it!".... and then i'd cry like an idiot...cus i've become a crier in secret .....shhhh don't tell.

Pastor Kerri:
This woman is kind of my hero. Even though i feel like every time i have any kind of moment with her i totally make myself look like an IDIOT she always smiles and makes me feel important. And during the year where i spent trying to hide from church...and when i actually came but just tried to be invisible..she would stop me and say "we've missed you", or "where ya been?"...and when i finally dragged myself totally broken back to church, her words were always encouraging and made me want to be a better person & a better wife. She will always be my reminder that
1. God entrusted me with his call
2. Empowered me with the strength to persevere through the storm
3. Chose me even though i am unworthy of it all
4. and more than anything that he looks upon me and calls me Beloved.

Thank you Pastor Kerri...you just wrote the title track to my upcoming album....

Heather Lester:
One day when i become a mother i hope that i can be a mother like heather. Her kids are amazing and she is so awesome. And more than anything she understands me. I can tell heather anything and she just understands my heart. And that is so rare to find.

My LindseyStar:
The only person besides my beautiful husband.....who really knows who i am. She knows me. She knows the worst parts and the best parts. She knows my songs, and is able to see through my tears and understands my ramblings, and incoherent thoughts. She is my dearest friend and one day the godmother to my children. Her songs make me cry and want to leave my heart on the altar. And in my darkest moments i would think of her and how she survived things no one should be able to survive and she still worships God in Spirit and in truth. She's my LindseyStar, my lighthouse, and if i were Jonathan she would be my David.

And so i guess i'll leave this blog saying i'm grateful. I'm, grateful for my husband who puts up with me and always makes me feel beautiful even though im constantly saying...i need to loose weight. I'm thankful for my family...who even though they're totally nuts they've helped shape who i am. I amazed God gave me these women to help mold me in this moment in my life and im thankful this fasting season im not fasting from the church, but for the first time im becoming part of the body Christ in a way i never new possible.

-Chari
"every bone in my body, Lord it cries Holy. every thread of my being, Lord it cries, Holy!"

My hands look old....

2009-01-15T18:36:00.001-05:00

My hands look old. I am not generally an "old person", i'm only 27....

But last night i looked at my hands and just thought "wow, my hands look old".

Life has been at times very difficult and other times life has been like a sunny day,

but lately i believe my hands reflect the last season or year of my life...

One of my goals for the next 21 days is to read more. Whether my Bible, or one of my books collecting dust....just to read. Today I read Ephesians, and Ephesians 4 moved me....."Live a life worthy of your calling" it said...

Live my life worthy of my calling....wow....I pray for that. I hope for that. I look at my hands and I wondered have these hands played my guitar worthy of my calling. Has my voice sang or said words worthy of my calling.....

I hope so. I really hope so.

Anne Hathaway: My Silent Protest

2009-01-09T17:00:00.001-05:00

Oh Anne!!

Washington Post Report on the issue

So i love Anne Hathaway....seen almost all her movies and well i am a fan. But what just drives me mad are celebrities who do or say things that if the normal person did or say then they would be deemed as wrong or not politically correct.

So Anne is a Big Obama Fan like most of the Country....and that's fine....but she has issues with the person he chose to be his "clergy rep" at the inauguration, Rick Warren. Ok Of course he is against gay marriage he is a Christian....doesn't take a brain scientist to know that! Well.. Miss hathaway is going to wear a red bow on the inauguration day in silent protest against Rick Warren! Okay I get it her brother is gay...But Rick Warren isn't bashing homosexuals he just has a system of beliefs that are contrary to many people that are not Christians.....

Dude! Come On...It's Ridiculous! Why doesn't she wear a ribbon to protest the war on terror, or the fight going on between Gaza and Israel or Abortion.....there are so many things she could put her talents into then wearing a stupid ribbon to protest Rick Warren....If Tom Cruise was the person picked to pray would she where an alien costume reppin' Xanu or Scientology.....How bout if Obama was a Mormon, would she rock Holy Underwear in Protest??? NOPE prolly not....

UUUUhhhhhh! I wish people just would start thinking for themselves and stop looking at hollywood for their moral code!

Ridiculous.

Eh...? huh...no...what! (inappropriate moment #4,675,987!)

2009-01-08T14:32:00.000-05:00

Yea...so every Thursday i have lunch/hang out time with my dear friends Mel, and Lin*! And today was no different...We went to our place and within seconds i do what i normally do when I am faced with an awkward moment...i embarrass myself and those around. As we walk in Mel immediately starts reading the menu board.....and lin quietly awaits the hostess....As for me i spot her coming towards us with a white shirt and red polka dots that seem to be trying to escape from her bra! And instead of acting like an adult I burst into laughter and turn my face so i won't like just be staring at her crazy get-up.....Mel notices and just starts mumbling...and trying to keep her composure and she blurts out "mmmmmm biscuits!?" And the poor girl says "you guys are laughing at me, yea my bra is showing"...and Lin with the most serious face and amazing composure says, "no! Wha? no not at all!" The girl actually believed her and went on her way....

Forget that the moments continued through out lunch and even as we went to starbucks...

I need to remedy the fact that my reactions tho honest, are usually quite inappropriate and wrong...most of the time they are wrong. Jesus must really love me because i am a mess..just a mess....well...i will be adding this to my fasting list!

Obsessions i've noticed latley....well noticed today.

2009-01-06T14:50:00.000-05:00

1. I always have a headache and everything gives me a headache. What's that about?
My husband says i give myself anxiety...that's partially true. I hate being late for anything so i'm always looking at my cell phone for the time...so that could be part of my headache...or that i feel there is never enough time in the day. I also find the root of craziness is that i worry about things that haven't even happened yet. And I wonder why they haven't happened yet and what will i do when they do happen. Man, i'm making myself crazy just thinking about how i do that.

2. I'm obsessed with my cell phone. I have to have it near me in my line of site at all times. You never know who might be sending a twitter or a text or calling. It could be the person i want to least speak to but i will pick up the phone because i am a crazy person.

3. I love taking naps. I will take a nap at any time. I think there should be a law passed that everyone should be given one hour nap times at their leisure during the day. Very Important!!

4. I am obsessed with starbucks. I will pay $6 for a cup of coffee twice a day everyday if esteban let me! that is ridiculous.

5. Tuesday's are my Favorite.

6. i need to read my Bible instead of stare at it and think "man, i need to read my Bible!"

7. I need to write more songs....i need to be constantly busy, constantly tuning my creative strings...

yep im trying to focus and or remedy those things

The Tattoo

2009-01-04T19:49:00.000-05:00

Ok so i got a tattoo last week. (see picture above)
I have always known i would eventually get one but for some reason every time i'd get close to going God would just show me that wasn't the right decision. So what changed you might wonder?....well the last 2 years of getting my (*expletive) handed to me!
Dude! this last season was so hard...whether it was the cancer, or the financial loss, or being stripped of who I thought I was..i knew if i ever came out of it would want something to remind me i survived...

I have lots of scars. Most i had no control of....so this one i could control.

SO what is the tattoo mean. Well my dearest friend and i had this amazing conversation one night that just revealed to me that I had overcome a trying season and she gave me the bird idea...so i found a dove i just fell in love with.... this simple bird would represent to me that through it all God had never left me alone. And the scripture reference is my favorite verse PSALMS 27.

1 The LORD is my light and my salvation—
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?

2 When evil men advance against me
to devour my flesh, [a]
when my enemies and my foes attack me,
they will stumble and fall.

3 Though an army besiege me,
my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
even then will I be confident.

4 One thing I ask of the LORD,
this is what I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD
all the days of my life,
to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD
and to seek him in his temple.

5 For in the day of trouble
he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his tabernacle
and set me high upon a rock.

6 Then my head will be exalted
above the enemies who surround me;
at his tabernacle will I sacrifice with shouts of joy;
I will sing and make music to the LORD.

7 Hear my voice when I call, O LORD;
be merciful to me and answer me.

8 My heart says of you, "Seek his [b] face!"
Your face, LORD, I will seek.

9 Do not hide your face from me,
do not turn your servant away in anger;
you have been my helper.
Do not reject me or forsake me,
O God my Savior.

10 Though my father and mother forsake me,
the LORD will receive me.

11 Teach me your way, O LORD;
lead me in a straight path
because of my oppressors.

12 Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,
for false witnesses rise up against me,
breathing out violence.

13 I am still confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living.

14 Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD.

It is 2009...

2009-01-04T12:17:00.000-05:00

Wow... so another year has past and i'm amazed at where God has brought me out of in only the last 6 months....and now its January 2009 and its that time for resolutions, time to make changes, time to put my faith into practice and try to make a difference.
I only have one resolution or one desire for 09'...i Just want to not miss God this year. I want make sure that i'm walking the path i'm called to and making life giving decisions.

The Fast:21 day fast
Our church is Fasting this month and i plan to take part. I feel so unworthy of all the blessings God dropped on Esteban and I in late 08'. I'm excited about really getting on my face and seeking God for 2009. One of the things I am most thankful for this is my church home. I'm constantly surrounded by life giving people and pastors who truly desire the heart of God. I feel so blessed.

The Album:charise.org
I've spent the last 10 years chasing the dream instead of the one who gave me this dream. And now that I've finally let it all go God gives it back to me in the most amazing way. My new album is in the works...songs have been chosen and the direction is set. The last year has been a rough one and im in awe of God, and how the songs I've written in such a desperate and secret place will be heard. It is scary to be vulnerable and allow people to see your issues.....but that is the way of the ninja i assume.

Life is good, and i'm ready....i'm ready to jump. Total surrender is a scary, fulfilling place...and it is now my new residence...

-chari